Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The background and the diagnosis.

My name is Suzanne and I am a 36 year-old mother of 2 amazing little boys. After separating from my ex-husband almost 5 years ago, I met Jimmi, the true love of my life. Being that Jimmi is 6 years younger than I am, our relationship started out slowly and took years to grow into what I now consider as perfect as any relationship can be. We got engaged on September 22, 2010, and I immediately jumped into action planning our special day so it would be one we would cherish forever. And with a tattoo artist and a Starbucks bar set for the reception, who would ever forget it??

Everything from the reception site to the photographer to the band to my dress was picked out and confirmed within a month after the engagement. September 3, 2011 couldn't come soon enough! But then, without warning, the excitement came to a smashing halt. After a routine pap smear showed abnormal cells, I was scheduled for a colposcopy - or biopsy - of my cervix. Those results showed higher abnormalities, so my gyn suggested doing a procedure called LEEP. The purpose of the LEEP is to take the top layer of cells from the cervix, hopefully removing any abnormal or pre-cancerous cells so new, healthy cells can grow back. It all seemed so simple.

The LEEP was performed on April 1, 2011. Everything went well and life seemed normal until I went for my follow-up with the gyn on April 14, 2011 to get the pathology results of the LEEP.

CANCER. I have cancer.

The shocked look on my doctor's face mirrored my own when he broke the news. No one expected that result. It was all supposed to be ok. I am a completely healthy person. I've never smoked or done drugs - I don't even drink. I exercise regularly, I eat right. I go for all of my routine check-ups with every doctor I'm supposed to see and I pay attention to my body. How could this happen to me??

So, what do I do now? My gyn recommended a gynecological oncologist. She wasn't available to see me until May 19th. But it's only April 14th! I called everyone I know to get other referrals to try and get in to see someone - ANYONE - sooner and start the process of fixing this so I could get on with my life. I chose 2 other oncologists who were both away for the upcoming Easter holiday, and made appointments for as soon as they got back - one on April 27th and one on May 6th. And then all I could do was wait.

When you're told you have cancer but aren't given any other details, waiting sucks. There's no other way to put it. It just flat-out blows. All I could do was wait and wonder and look at my little boys and hope I'd be around for them to watch them grow up.

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