I got the boys out of bed and went downstairs to get breakfast ready while they were brushing their teeth.
I'll check my e-mail.
Junk, spam, crap...Oh no. It's an e-mail I've been waiting for for a month now. But I can't get myself to open it. I don't want to look. But I do. How can I open the attachment without crying? I don't even know what to write back. What should I tell her? Should I pretend it's all ok and proceed as planned? What if it's NOT all ok? I stare blankly at the message, ignoring the attachment...I don't know what to do. Do I even want to look at it?
It's the proof for my wedding invitation.
There it is, in black and white:
The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of Suzanne Marie Paragano and James Joseph Kane 11
Saturday, the third of September
two-thousand and eleven
Shit. What do I do? It's beautiful, of course. My first thought is to hit reply and say, "Go to print!!" But then reality hits me in the head like a brick and my head starts pounding again.
The proof looks great, but I have a question. I just found out I have cervical cancer. It's been a crazy few weeks trying to figure out what the treatment will be and if we will need to reschedule the wedding. It's been rough. What is the absolute latest date I can let you know to go ahead on printing the invitations? We're hoping to proceed as planned, but I won't know for sure until next week. Please let me know.